Archive for the ‘Marriage’ Category


DignityIn one of our NCCF state conference in Sokoto State, a pastor told us a story about a lady that sneaked out of NYSC camp and came to stand by the road side. A young boy came with a car, picked her up, took her to a hotel and slept with her. Two weeks after posting, she discovered that the boy was an SS 2 student in her place of primary assignment. What a shame!

Pastor Tunde Bakare declared, “If you don’t put a price on yourself, people will price you cheap.”  Ninety percent (90%) of ladies and guys, who maintain their moral standard at home, defile themselves when they get to higher institution. Ninety Eight (98%) of ladies and guys who maintain purity in Campus because of Campus fellowship, stain their garment during NYSC. (more…)

10 Keys To Become Outstanding In Life


1. Reading    2. Positive Mind-set     3. God’s Knowledge    4. Vision  5. Focus      6. Determination        7. Persistence         8. Self-control 9. Preparation    10. Time Management

Abraham Lincoln once said, “I will study and prepare myself and someday I know my chance will come.” You must study and prepare yourself because when you dodge the season of preparation, the time of manifestation will escape you. If you want to become an outstanding citizen tomorrow, start reading today. Everybody is supposed to be a reader. Unfortunately, 98% of Nigerians don’t know the importance of reading. Ken Sarowiwa noted, “You cannot be in charge unless you are charged.” One of the things that can charge your mental faculty and position you in the orbit of success is reading.

John Mason, “You may succeed if nobody else believes in you but you will never succeed if you do not believe in yourself.” Believe in oneself is a major key to succeed in life. The scripture says, “Everything is possible to him that believes” (Mark 9:23).  Elbert Hubbard asserted, “Picture in your mind, the able earnest useful person you desire to be and the thought you hold is hourly transforming you to the particular individual you admire. Roosevelt was crippled by polio. Instead of allowing that disability to hold him back, he cultivated a never-give-up attitude that enabled him to become the only united state president to run for four terms. How far you can go in life depend solely on the degree of positive thinking inside you.

St. Augustine declares, “We were made for God and we will be restless until will find rest in him.” The knowledge of God is the first key to become outstanding in life. God creates way when seems there is no way. When you make a decision to serve the most high, you will find yourself in the highest point of success. Common thing is enough for God to do the unusual. Progress is not all about accumulation but moving line in what God created you to be. If God is ahead, He can handle what is behind.

What is vision? Vision is a mental picture of your future and a preview to your greatness. You need vision to become an outstanding citizen – a first class material in all areas of life. The bible says, “Where there is no vision, the people perished”(Proverbs 29:18). Every vision is for an appointed time not “now”. Any dream that is “now” is not dream but a nightmare. Every great achievement of a man is a dream before it comes into reality.  Vision sees the invisible, believe the incredible and achieve the impossible.

Focus the ability to pay attention to a particular thing irrespective of distraction. There is invisible and invincible power in focus. It is only those with focus that have determination. It takes focus to finish what you started. It is broken focus that makes people to quit from a particular thing and engage in another thing. It takes a focus to set a target. When there is nothing you are aiming at, you appreciate anything that comes. Be a man of one thing and not a man of many things. You must have a focal point because no matter how fast you are in a wrong path, you can never get to your destination.

Determination is the power to hold on irrespective of distraction and opposition. Where the determination is, the way can be found. On the way to your dream land, you must across challenges but when you determine, you will succeed. Determination is facing obstacle and never look back. If you determine, you don’t stop until you win. Nobody is making it today that has never fail one day. When you are determine, irrespective of your failure, you don’t loss hope. Richard Nixon observed, “Man is not finished when he is defeated but he is finished when he quits.” In any area of life, determination can single you out and make you an outstanding citizen.

Persistence is a major key to succeed in all areas of life. A lot of people give up their ambition and pursuit in life when they have just a step to take. Dreams must be back up with undying and relentless persistence. Success comes to those who are committed. Charles Dickens spent only four years in high school.  He wanted to become an author but people despise him because he was not qualified. The first manuscript he produced was carried out overnight in the secret to avoid mockers. He roamed around the streets of London for so many years. He focused and persisted and eventually he became a renowned author.

You can never be the person you are supposed to be if self-control and discipline are taking away from you.  The ultimate measure of a man/woman is his/her ability to control himself/herself sexually, financially and emotionally. A wise man said, “The difference between a man/woman and a dog is self-control.” In any area of life, self-control and discipline can take you from the bottom of life to the zenith of life. When it comes to success in life, self-control is everything.

Preparation is very necessary in the life of every human being. When you dodge the season of preparation, the time of manifestation will escape you. It pays to prepare ahead because it was not raining when Noah build the ark. When you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail. Every one that is shining today was the one that prepare yesterday. To fulfill your destiny you must be prepare. No preparation, no manifestation.

Time is the most precious commodity and how will manage it determines how our lives turn out. Time is all the years in the present, past and future. If you must be an outstanding citizen, you must know how to manage your time. An evangelist said, “Real men sleep 4 hours, women sleep 7 hours whiles fools sleep 9 hours.” Therefore, don’t sleep your time away. Don’t smoke, gossip, wander or drink your time away. The future starts from today. We are in the era when the level of your success is determined by the amount of wisdom you apply with time. Singapore gain their independent in 1965 and between that year and 2000, they were able to move from the strata of third world nations to that of the first world nations. How were they able to achieve this? They apply wisdom with time.

NB: For detail, get a copy of my book: 10 keys to become outstanding in life

Five principles to build up godly homes & marriages

Five principles to build up godly homes & marriages

1. TOLERANCE: Tolerance is very necessary for the success of any marriage. It is one of the principles you cannot do without if you really want your marriage to succeed. Bimbo Odukoya advised, “When you are going out with a guy or a lady, find out those things you cannot tolerate”. If you discover thing you cannot tolerate, the earlier you quit, the better. For instance, can you tolerate a guy or a lady who can commit adultery? Can you tolerate a liar or a thief? Can you tolerate someone who is nagging? These are things that don’t matter but matters a lot. Therefore, when you are going out in courtship, find out those you cannot tolerate and decide on what to do.

“Look before you leap” is a good advice to everyone who wants to have a successful marriage. You can’t find a perfect partner but you must x-ray those things you can tolerate. If you can’t tolerate it, it will terminate your marriage. “Marriage is an institution you will not graduate from, for the rest of your life,” said Benson Idahosa. Wedlock is padlock.

 2. DISCIPLINE: Discipline is one of the principled to build Godly homes and marriage. To discipline your partner, you must first discipline yourself. Abraham Lincoln noted, “The best way to show a child the way he should go is to walk in the way.” Leading by example is better than leading by words; for action speak louder than voice.

There is restriction in discipline. Permitting your children to watch all manner of programs on television is not likeness, rather, you are creating a stumbling block for their future success. Gabriel Oluyemi stated,” those that will lead revolution should not spend all their time watching television.” You need discipline before usage,” said evangelist Okoroafor. Uncle Steve noted, “Great men are not product of utterances but product of discipline”.

3. CORRECTION: The ability to take correction is one of the ways to build up Godly homes and Marriages. There is no perfect human being. It is only God that perfect. Therefore, we need correction in one area of our lives or the other. If you are willing to learn, every problem and error is correctable. Correctable people are very easy to be corrected. Rev. Fr. Richmond declared, “You can proof me wrong in my diction, you can proof me wrong in my sentences. But you cannot proof the word of God wrong.” You don’t need to proof your partner wrong because there is a place for correction in marriage.

Children grow character through correction and discipline. “lecturing your children can sometimes be as out of place as singing to people in morning, but a whipping is a wise choice of discipline at any time (Sirach 30:9-11). To be a man or woman of character, you need correction & discipline.GOOD

4. VIRTUE: Without good virtue in the home, that marriage is a failure. Uncle Steve noted, “A princess must first of all grow character or else she will become a shame to her clan.” It takes a moralist and a disciplinarian to have a good virtue. You need good virtue to bring up your children in a Godly way. If you don’t have it, you can’t pass it to your children. Rev. E.O. Ikako said, “The children and youths we refuse to train today, will give us sleepless night, today and tomorrow.” He went further to say: “training is not just passing oral instruction; it is passing your life into your student and transferring your lifestyle into children.”

 5. DOMESTICATION: We are in the era of Mr. Biggs, GT, Sweet Sensation, Shoprite and other fast food joints. As a wife, if you don’t know how to cook a simple dish, you are not qualified for marriage. Marriage don’t eliminate challenges, rather, it creates more challenges. ”If you can’t prepare a simple meal and keep the house clean, don’t think of marriage because there is a home to fix,” said Uncle Steve. Evangelist Chidi noted, “Being a Christian is a full time job.” Likewise, being a husband or wife is a full time job. To build up a Godly home and marriage we must well domesticate our children. Courage Ode stated, “The role of a mother is completely different from the role of a man.”

Choosing a life partner

choosing a life partner

Your most qualify partner is not the one that is tall or short, dark or fair, slim or fat, rich or poor, educated or uneducated but the one that is best fit into your dream and vision in life. As a man, your vision must be big enough to accommodate your wife. When God created Eve, He made her a help mate to Adam. Until you discover yourself, you cannot discover your partner. You need to have a purpose before you make a move to choose a partner. Marriage is not just for sex and enjoyment but for destiny fulfillment.

 There are different kinds of materials in marriage. There are some ladies that are business materials, some political materials some ministry materials and some home materials. As a man, when God gives you a vision, you will know who to carry along. Not all ladies can help you to fulfill your dream. Likewise, ladies,  not all men can help you to fulfill your destiny. Know what you want and go for it.